Despite the progress we’ve made, lesbian relationships are still often misunderstood or misrepresented. Let’s bust some common myths and celebrate the truth about lesbian love.
1. “One of You Must Be the ‘Man’ in the Relationship.”
Nope.
Absolutely not!
You are two women. There are no men present, that’s kind of the point.
One may have more “masculine” interests or a more “masculine” dress sense, but that doesn’t mean that they are a man, because interests and clothes are just hobbies and pieces of fabric at the end of the day. They don’t magically change you into the opposite sex.
2. “Lesbian Relationships Are Easier Than Straight Ones.”
Girl… That is adorably naive. Every relationship requires work, communication, and mutual respect, regardless of sex.
You’ll meet wonderful, thoughtful women who make you feel like a Princess, but you’ll also meet rude, self absorbed women who make you feel like an afterthought. Being with a woman doesn’t mean that it will be plain sailing.
3. “All Lesbians U-Haul.”
While moving quickly is a stereotype, every couple moves at their own pace—and that’s perfectly fine.
Maybe there is a little less game playing and mixed messages, which allows relationships to move at a faster pace, but that’s not always the case.
If you find things are moving slowly, that isn’t always a bad thing, and it isn’t abnormal either.
4. “Lesbian Relationships Are Just Friendships.”
Wrong. Lesbian love is just as deep, romantic, and multifaceted as any other form of romantic and sexual love.
I certainly would not treat any of my friends in the way that I would my lovers, and I’m sure you wouldn’t either.
5. “Lesbians Relationships Are Just Like Porn.”
Loud and wrong.
Hypersexual lesbian relationships where there is nothing going on but dead eyed humping and banshee shrieking are an invention of porn for heterosexual men and frankly, have nothing to do with the actual reality of lesbian life. The depiction of lesbian sex in porn is entirely inaccurate, and it’s pretty much impossible to meet a lesbian who engages in the kind of crap you see in pornography.
Who on Earth would let someone put their huge acrylic nails inside of their vagina? Why are they ALWAYS using phallic toys when they appear to be dwindling in appeal within the actual lesbian community. And tell me why all these alleged lesbians end up with a man in between them for some kind of psychotic “conversion” threesome ritual at some point?
It’s all nonsense, beloved. Explicit fairy stories for flacid, fetishising men. Pay it no mind.
6. “All Lesbians Want Kids/All Lesbians Don’t Want Kids.”
Some do, some don’t. Like anyone else, lesbians have a range of desires when it comes to family planning.
Honestly, what a woman does with her uterus is her business, and so the best way to figure this out is to talk to your girl, upfront, honestly and often.
7. “Lesbian Relationships Are Always Drama-Free.”
While many lesbian relationships are beautiful and healthy, no one is immune to challenges.
Unfortunately, heartbreak doesn’t discriminate based on sexuality, and you can’t count on there being no drama, just because you’re both women.
Restless Violets 
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